A while ago I had a discussion with a few close friends, which its topic was quite sensitive regarding subjects that no one talks about or wants to talk about. It fragile stuff that has made sure we never want to bring it up and leave it with the mysteries of time. Stuff to bottle up in our own and preferably throw away the key, all because we don’t think it’s normal or doesn’t live up to our expectations or society. Therefore to understand once again that society has set us up to feel and think the way we do.
A great example to portray this topic is when one would have problems in the relationship with his or her’s significant other; concede to the idea of going to the therapist, admitting to depression or financial struggles, or even the well-known great battles with weight. All of the above have proven every time that whatever happens to us, we dare not to admit to them, for we think that these types of occurrences are pertinent failure in the eyes of any about us. The funny thing is that all of which mentioned that nobody wants to talk about, many can relate to. Ultimately these kinds of anxiety results, preferably never to open up and speak of it, develops the dreading detachment and lost on our own.
Since our society has conquered levels of exceptional standards, we created a culture. Through all of it, somehow and somewhere we demanded ourselves no longer to talk about these disconcerting subjects, feeling uncomfortable, that we’d cast it away as far as possible in our archives. The key to this archive is already on the bottom of some lake. When did we become so shameful about our very thoughts? The same thoughts that will always shape humanity to what we are; the same thoughts which truly are THE KEY to bring us closer and faster to the solution we’d hope to reach long ago.
Another writer by the name of Brene B. has written many under these topics about struggling with vulnerability, which of course is literature. Feeling slightly loose? You can always choose to read the Karl Mind Story, which includes many of these topics as well, only wrapped in a creative fancy story.
To give a flair of the Brene’s writing and the story of Karl Mind could be described as an experience o believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of many things we long for.
There are a few categories combined with the story of Karl Mind, where shame often stirs:
- Money and work
- Surviving trauma
- Being stereotyped or labeled
“Great and all to mention a list of many of our vulnerabilities, but how do we battle shame?”
OPEN UP, AND TALK ABOUT THIS VULNERABILITY
We ever feed shame when we dare not to share word about this. It feeds of our silence and encourages our mind to continue to do so. And we easily let It control us because we receive in return the greatest shield that masks as one who never reach such levels.
But in order to let it not control us, we need to harvest enough courage and power to make ourselves aware of this fact, and name it: SHAME, yes it’s called shame. Name it and its face will feel what you’ve called it by name. Break it by returning its sound back to him and it will hunger to a branch. Let it not feed on you like a vampire, but expose it to the light, your light. Make your closest friends who you trust the most known to have your back in this. They are your weapons; your tools that help you the most to cast away this shame. While at the same time of this battle, you know truly you are not alone. The joy of helping one other, is far more grateful.
Never fear being judged on what you’re dealing with or the way you’re with it, as long as you deal with it.We learn constantly.
So you can see by saying these things that we have much more in common than we think. Share, speak and open up. There is always something that keeps us in the dark where Shame rules solely. We have come this far, we have managed ourselves to this level, only that dark needs to be solved. We can do this because YES WE CAN!
- Fear not
- Close friends are your weapons
- You will feel not alone
- Name it, SHAME!
Tell me, do you ever confront this SHAME? Do you or have you ever talked about it or bottle it up?